[9S lifts a hand and hesitates, but ultimately, it hurts to watch her like this. He lays a hand over one of hers, the one within his reach. It's a cautious, light touch, but something within him aches at seeing her this way, and he wishes desperately that he could make it stop. Something like this was the reason he thought it best to pretend that he remembered nothing at all and that their past wasn't a matter they would ever have to confront.
But he knows that his mistake made this conversation inevitable. There is nothing for it but to press on, and hope that he hasn't destroyed whatever happiness 2B could enjoy in this place, away from the unending conflict that they had always lived in]
2B... [His voice is choked, strained under his need to fix this, and the uncertainty of whether he possibly can] I know...I know you are. But I made things hard for you too, didn't I? I didn't let you go when you wanted me to. When you asked me to.
[And so he had perpetuated her hardships, hadn't he? It was a vicious cycle, and even if he had ended her, there was no guarantee that she wouldn't be deployed again without those memories and forced to repeat the same task just the same. Maybe he would've been assigned to another E-unit. There's no way of knowing.
All he does know was that dying over and over again with the promise that they'd meet once more was preferable to the alternative. Because of that, he had placed a cruel burden on her, one she shouldn't have had to live with.
That 2B is punishing herself this way because of him...it seems wrong.
Maybe he can make her understand if he approaches it this way]
Can you forgive me for what I put you through?
[It's something that he's afraid to ask her, because it means that he's confronting how he has wronged her. And maybe that will remind her that where she didn't have a choice, he did. The choice he made for her, for both of them, prolonged her hardships. It's possible that if he had chosen otherwise nothing would have changed, but even so...
Maybe, if 2B does forgive him that, it can make more sense to her that he doesn't hold her role in his life against her any longer. For a time he had, just as he has said, but he'd lost her once. And that told him all he needed to know about whether he ever wanted harm her or be without her, in the end]
no subject
But he knows that his mistake made this conversation inevitable. There is nothing for it but to press on, and hope that he hasn't destroyed whatever happiness 2B could enjoy in this place, away from the unending conflict that they had always lived in]
2B... [His voice is choked, strained under his need to fix this, and the uncertainty of whether he possibly can] I know...I know you are. But I made things hard for you too, didn't I? I didn't let you go when you wanted me to. When you asked me to.
[And so he had perpetuated her hardships, hadn't he? It was a vicious cycle, and even if he had ended her, there was no guarantee that she wouldn't be deployed again without those memories and forced to repeat the same task just the same. Maybe he would've been assigned to another E-unit. There's no way of knowing.
All he does know was that dying over and over again with the promise that they'd meet once more was preferable to the alternative. Because of that, he had placed a cruel burden on her, one she shouldn't have had to live with.
That 2B is punishing herself this way because of him...it seems wrong.
Maybe he can make her understand if he approaches it this way]
Can you forgive me for what I put you through?
[It's something that he's afraid to ask her, because it means that he's confronting how he has wronged her. And maybe that will remind her that where she didn't have a choice, he did. The choice he made for her, for both of them, prolonged her hardships. It's possible that if he had chosen otherwise nothing would have changed, but even so...
Maybe, if 2B does forgive him that, it can make more sense to her that he doesn't hold her role in his life against her any longer. For a time he had, just as he has said, but he'd lost her once. And that told him all he needed to know about whether he ever wanted harm her or be without her, in the end]